Ibiza...Land of the Merry

This feels so weird to be writing about Ibiza so long after I was there, its about a month ago, thats how far behind I am on this blog!!! AHHHHHHH

Ok, don't stress Katie, they all know you're not superwoman.

So just as an explanation, we decided to go to Ibiza on a bit of a whim, for a week and party like the rest of them all that go there. 
Ibiza is world famous, most young people know where it is, "musicians" and I us "these," because I'm sure that term is debatable in a lot of instances, refer to this party island in their songs. And we knew it wouldn't be for everyone, but we like to party, and dance and go to cool clubs and what not, but lets just say it didn't blow our minds. But lets start at the beginning.

We planned to spend a week on Ibiza but only booked a hotel (sounds fancy it wasn't trust me, budget means hotels with bed bugs that even if you cover the mattress with lavender oil still bite the hell out of your arms, still got the scabs to prove it.) for 5 nights, which meant that we had two nights with no accommodation  So on arriving on Ibiza early one saturday morning, we went to the "hotel" and asked them to keep our bags while we "went bush" (the term Maria excitedly used) for a couple of nights. 
We  then packed our day backpacks with bathers, some clothes, a towel and the stuff we didn't trust the hotel to look after for us, i.e this computer, and jumped on a bus to take us to a nice quiet beach, where we would camp for two nights before coming back and checking into the hotel. We literally picked a beach on the map that had a bus going there in the next half an hour, when we were at the bus stop. And we found this beautiful little cove that was perfect. And it was great, in the morning I got up and went for a nudie swim; the water was warm and we had a healthy amount of other nude and partially nude bodies to keep us company in the day. We sunbaked and swam and sunbaked and slept and ate and swam.

 On the second day we were there, we met a really nice guy  who took us out for dinner at this really nice pizza place and then insisted that we sleep at his house, so we did (just on the plastic recliner chairs in his front yard) and luckily we did, because early in the morning it started to rain.

We then went and checked into our "hotel" and spent the next five days doing god knows what. We only went our Clubbing three times, but trust me that was enough for us. The thing I don't get is how everyone there manages to go out partying every night and all night too, and then instead of sleeping they go to the beach. I know they all sleep on the beach but seriously I couldn't have put on my bathers in that  state of tiredness even if I wanted to. So really all we saw was a little bit of the town which wasn't pretty. We stayed in the cheaper budget town on the other side of the island, San Antonio, which to try and describe it nicely, put mix croydon with the gold coast (sorry for all you foreign folk, but I only know how to describe this with Australian cities and towns) and fill it with young people from

Queensland (sorry Queensland) but instead of having broad australian accents, give them really bad English ones. And you have San Antonio. There were people walking down the street in bikinis and half of their body would be covered in purple leopard print. Now, I don't want to put you off Ibiza, and we did have fun, its just, well, somewhere Geordie Shore would and did go.

We did have fun though, we saw Dizzee Rascal at Ibiza Rocks outside in a thunderstorm with drenching rain. Awesome. We went to a hippy flower power party at a massive club. And we saw David Guetta. 

We also met a girl who has been on The Valleys (which for you all who don't know is the Welsh version of Geordie Shore. And if you don't know what Geordie Shore is, then look it up) which pretty much sums up the crowd.

It sounds like I hated it, but I didn't, I promise. It was great at times and extremely off-putting at times.

The clubs all have these dancers and at David Guetta's night (called F**k me I'm Famous, so we should have guessed) they had these shows which to me felt like I was watching porn. They started of wearing "clothes" and by the end of the night were not. I am too much of a feminist to not get a little angry when I think about this, and the rude finger was used a little to express my annoyance on the night. But it was really the awkwardness of the girls trying to get up onto these big rings hanging from the ceiling in stiletto thigh high boots, that in my un-alcohol induced state could see their awkwardness, while below them men (and some women) all videoed it on their phones. It was gross, I'm sorry but it was. The looks on the guys faces as they watched the show was disturbing and didn't really give them a good rep in my eyes. The only thing I could think of doing instead of watching, was to dance as crazily and as stupidly with Maria to David Guetta, who we had really came to see, which meant that probably quite a few people couldn't quite see the show, and we did get some funny looks, but it was the best option, better then standing there rolling our eyes and being sassily bored ( I don't do sassy very well see).

That being said, we did have fun, if you forget about the naked women and men (see I wouldn't lie, it's just there were a lot more naked women then naked men present)

This is the little cove that we spent the night in, swimming in the day and sleeping under the moon and stars.

The water was so amazingly blue.

The view from our balcony.

Found an Australia on a peach!

The old town of Ibiza, 

much prettier and not at all party scene.

We slept a lot in the day too so didn't (thank god) have to endure too much of San Antonio. We did however go over to the main town on the island, Aivissa or Ibiza, either way works. Which is much nicer , more expensive and posh. No vom on the ground though and people that actually are having meals instead of a pure alcoholic diet. we walked around the old part of the town which is situated on top of a hill overlooking the sea and the ret of the town, which was lovely.

So to conclude, I had fun but enough to do me for one lifetime, I think.

Over and Out.

Love Katie G